Get-a-grip-on-reality TV

It’s Monday night, so that means that most of the members of my family are ready to watch “American Pickers”, where two guys travel around the country looking for junk to buy so they can re-sell it and make a profit.  There’s also “American Restorations”, which revolves around a guy who fixes up junky stuff for a big profit.  Then there’s “Pawn Stars”, a fascinating show about four guys who run a pawn shop and all the things they buy.  It never really shows them selling anything, but it’s sponsored by Subway, so at some point it shows at least one of the guys eating a Subway sandwich.

 These are considered “reality” shows, so the cast members will occasionally bicker and joke around with each other, just to make them seem more “real”. 

 I watch these shows with the kids every once in awhile, and I guess we all get a little bit of a history lesson along the way, since they always trace the history of the items they pick/restore/buy.  However, I used the term “fascinating” earlier with tongue firmly in cheek.  Have we totally run out of ideas for TV shows?  There are several shows I’ve never watched, just because they sound totally pointless.  Who wants to watch a show about people losing weight?  Or a show about a chef who yells at people and belittles them?  Or a show where people eat bugs and other crap to make it seem like they’re “surviving”?  Or a show that has a hot-looking single babe trying to decide which hunky single dude she wants to go out with?

With all this being said, you can only imagine some of the ideas rolling around in my mind.  Here goes…some sure-fire ideas for new reality TV shows!

Lawn Stars – Random people are showcased every week mowing their lawns, and discussing the challenges they face with crabgrass, weeds and grubworms.

 American Nose-Pickers – This program will examine nose-picking as an art form, and examine famous “pickers” through history.

 The Real Survivor – Charts the current career (or lack thereof) of David Bickler, the lead singer on “Eye of the Tiger”. 

Tanzania’s Got Talent – Watch residents of this East African nation compete for the grand prize…a passport and a ticket out of Tanzania.

 American Dry Cleaners – A camera chronicles the different articles of clothing brought in to a dry cleaner everyday.  Imagine the drama that unfolds when a jacket isn’t ready on time, or a blouse is damaged.

Wisconsin Big Brother – A show about my big brother, Randy.

Exteme Takover – Formerly a show hosted by Regis Philbin known as “Who Wants To Be A Dictator?”

Jon and Kate Just Ate – Jon and Kate Gosselin resolve their differences and get back together. This holiday program shows the couple after Thanksgiving dinner unbuckling their jeans and laying around belching.

Fart Factor – Each week, one person is chosen to reveal which foods make them fart the most.

Think these ideas sound far-fetched?  Don’t come crying to me when you hear some announcer say “coming soon to CBS…”


About groovyrick

I live in a small town in Illinois with my wife and three kids. I am a part-time musician, part-time writer, and full-time dreamer.
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1 Response to Get-a-grip-on-reality TV

  1. Ha ha ha! Hilarious show ideas, Rick! And don’t be surprised if one of them does get picked up. Albert Brooks once did a parody TV show about a guy living with two girls and about a year later, “Three’s Company” hit the airwaves!

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