It would be cool to go to work if I were a…

It’s Sunday night, and I have the same Sunday night feeling I’ve had all my life. That feeling of dread. Tomorrow, it’s back to reality. In the old days, it meant the reality of school. Now, it’s the reality of going back to the office to face another Monday morning.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate my job. I don’t even dislike it. I have it down pretty well, so there aren’t too many surprises. And it pays well with good benefits. So I shouldn’t really complain. But does anyone REALLY get excited about going to work? I remember Eric Clapton once saying in an interview, “When it comes to being creative and working hard in the studio or just laying around doing nothing, laying around wins every time.”

I once again have to refer to the greatest movie of all time, “High Fidelity,” and go to the part where his girlfriend finds his list of top five jobs:

  1. New Musical Express journalist, 1976-1979
  2. Producer, Atlantic Records, 1964-1971 (approx.)
  3. Any kind of musician (apart from classical or rap)
  4. Film Director
  5. Architect

Even he can’t understand we he listed “architect”. As always, I got to thinking. What would my top five jobs be?  I’m going a step further than Rob Gordon and see if I can google some salary estimates.

Rick’s Top Five Jobs

1-Afternoon Drive/WLS 890AM/1964-1974/Salary-?: Admittedly, that’s a really long time to stay in the same time slot, and I have no idea what Dex Card would have been making in the mid-60’s. But I’m sure he wasn’t starving. Doing afternoons means that you wouldn’t have to get out of bed ridiculously early, and think about who your co-workers would be: Larry Lujack, Clark Weber, Ron Riley. And think about who you would get to MEET: The Beatles, The Stones, Zeppelin…anybody who was anybody in popular music. Would I have the qualifications to do this job? You bet. In fact, here’s a totally geeky fact about me: when I was working at ‘BNQ and had a studio at my disposal 24/7, I made a two hour “Rick Halberg on WLS 1965” radio show. It really sounded pretty cool!

2-Late night TV talk show host/current/Salary-$31.5 million: I am going by what Letterman makes a year…31.5 mil. How could any job suck when you make that kind of cash? Again, I don’t think you have to get up terribly early, you have a staff of writers to come up with your funny stuff so the pressure is off of you, and you get to sit and chat with cool people…even make fun of them if you like. And since you’re done taping around 6, you can still go out and do something fun and be home in time to watch your show. Would I have the qualifications to do this job? You bet. I would even make a great sidekick. In fact, when it was announced that Jay Leno was taking over for Johnny Carson on the Tonight Show, I sent a resume to essentially be his Ed McMahon. I received a nice letter from his producer, informing me that they would maybe contact me later. That producer eventually committed suicide.

3-Daytime TV game show host/current/Salary-$854,000 per year: I’m basing the salary estimate on what Drew Carey makes hosting The Price Is Right. That’s probably at the high end of the scale. Does Alex Trebeck make that kind of cash? Probably not, but I’m sure it’s not a terribly tough job. About all you have to do is ask questions and explain rules, then console someone if they don’t win. Would I have the qualifications for this job? You bet. I’m really good at explaining, and I’m even better at consoling people. Maybe I could get a Richard Dawson-kind of gig where I get to kiss all the babes.

4-Research Assistant/Mythbusters/current/Salary-$270,000 per year: Have you ever watched Mythbusters? It’s like having a chemistry set with unlimited chemicals! And they always look like they’re having fun!  They get to blow things up! They get to drive fast! They get to hang out with Kari Byron, who is TOTALLY hot!  Would I have the qualifications to do this job? You bet! I look pretty good in goggles, and can laugh and joke with Jamie and Adam. And when something is ready to blow up, I would use my body as a shield so Kari wouldn’t get hurt from flying debri.

5-Lotto winner/current/$120 million: Would I have the qualifications to do this job? Oh yeah…………


About groovyrick

I live in a small town in Illinois with my wife and three kids. I am a part-time musician, part-time writer, and full-time dreamer.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to It would be cool to go to work if I were a…

  1. Tara says:

    Rick — Thank you. Every Sunday is like a ticking time bomb for me. As it gets later and later, I think about work and how I don’t want to go. I think about calling in sick LITERALLY every Monday…and my job isn’t horrible either…although I think I would prefer your job over mine. I’ve also always wanted to be a reenactment actor but I heard they don’t make alot. What I’d really like to be is a tv critic. I don’t want to brag, but I am an excellent tv watcher but how does one become credible in this? help! anyone?

    • Beth says:

      Tara, while there is not a lot of money in it, you could see if you can write for about TV shows. I am the Atlanta Ethnic Foods Examiner and the Atlanta Ethnic Restaurant Examiner, so I’m what’s called a local Examiner, based totally in Atlanta. You might be more interested in being a National Examner, reviewing TV. Check it out at Make sure you change the location to National. If there is not an available catagory that you like, make one up–a friend of mind did this and they accepted it. If you decide to sign up, please use my name, since I get a small bonus. My articles are at:
      Beth Robinette

  2. Sunday nights aren’t a problem for me, because I don’t have to go in to work till the afternoon, so I usually go out on the town and don’t think about it. But when Monday morning rolls around, I definitely feel it. If I could pick my line of work, I think I would be a professional drinker, or a female breast inspector.

  3. Totally agree about the “Mythbusters” job–it looks like they’re having so much fun, especially the 3 “junior” Mythbusters who work together.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s