It’s Sunday night, and I have the same Sunday night feeling I’ve had all my life. That feeling of dread. Tomorrow, it’s back to reality. In the old days, it meant the reality of school. Now, it’s the reality of going back to the office to face another Monday morning.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate my job. I don’t even dislike it. I have it down pretty well, so there aren’t too many surprises. And it pays well with good benefits. So I shouldn’t really complain. But does anyone REALLY get excited about going to work? I remember Eric Clapton once saying in an interview, “When it comes to being creative and working hard in the studio or just laying around doing nothing, laying around wins every time.”
I once again have to refer to the greatest movie of all time, “High Fidelity,” and go to the part where his girlfriend finds his list of top five jobs:
- New Musical Express journalist, 1976-1979
- Producer, Atlantic Records, 1964-1971 (approx.)
- Any kind of musician (apart from classical or rap)
- Film Director
Even he can’t understand we he listed “architect”. As always, I got to thinking. What would my top five jobs be? I’m going a step further than Rob Gordon and see if I can google some salary estimates.
Rick’s Top Five Jobs
1-Afternoon Drive/WLS 890AM/1964-1974/Salary-?: Admittedly, that’s a really long time to stay in the same time slot, and I have no idea what Dex Card would have been making in the mid-60’s. But I’m sure he wasn’t starving. Doing afternoons means that you wouldn’t have to get out of bed ridiculously early, and think about who your co-workers would be: Larry Lujack, Clark Weber, Ron Riley. And think about who you would get to MEET: The Beatles, The Stones, Zeppelin…anybody who was anybody in popular music. Would I have the qualifications to do this job? You bet. In fact, here’s a totally geeky fact about me: when I was working at ‘BNQ and had a studio at my disposal 24/7, I made a two hour “Rick Halberg on WLS 1965” radio show. It really sounded pretty cool!
2-Late night TV talk show host/current/Salary-$31.5 million: I am going by what Letterman makes a year…31.5 mil. How could any job suck when you make that kind of cash? Again, I don’t think you have to get up terribly early, you have a staff of writers to come up with your funny stuff so the pressure is off of you, and you get to sit and chat with cool people…even make fun of them if you like. And since you’re done taping around 6, you can still go out and do something fun and be home in time to watch your show. Would I have the qualifications to do this job? You bet. I would even make a great sidekick. In fact, when it was announced that Jay Leno was taking over for Johnny Carson on the Tonight Show, I sent a resume to essentially be his Ed McMahon. I received a nice letter from his producer, informing me that they would maybe contact me later. That producer eventually committed suicide.
3-Daytime TV game show host/current/Salary-$854,000 per year: I’m basing the salary estimate on what Drew Carey makes hosting The Price Is Right. That’s probably at the high end of the scale. Does Alex Trebeck make that kind of cash? Probably not, but I’m sure it’s not a terribly tough job. About all you have to do is ask questions and explain rules, then console someone if they don’t win. Would I have the qualifications for this job? You bet. I’m really good at explaining, and I’m even better at consoling people. Maybe I could get a Richard Dawson-kind of gig where I get to kiss all the babes.
4-Research Assistant/Mythbusters/current/Salary-$270,000 per year: Have you ever watched Mythbusters? It’s like having a chemistry set with unlimited chemicals! And they always look like they’re having fun! They get to blow things up! They get to drive fast! They get to hang out with Kari Byron, who is TOTALLY hot! Would I have the qualifications to do this job? You bet! I look pretty good in goggles, and can laugh and joke with Jamie and Adam. And when something is ready to blow up, I would use my body as a shield so Kari wouldn’t get hurt from flying debri.
5-Lotto winner/current/$120 million: Would I have the qualifications to do this job? Oh yeah…………